Survival Skills

Too often these days, parents feel they have no choice but to pack their child's schedules with adult-supervised, adult-driven activities such as organized sports. But, as a report from the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) makes clear, such activities should not come at the expense of free and unstructured play, which is critical to healthy child development.

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If you feel like sports are taking too much of your and family's time and money, if you are ready to exclaim, "Stop the world, I want to get off," you need to restore some sanity and find a better balance. It is possible to create balance within your family's everyday life, even with children who participate in sports. But it is up to you as the parent to make certain that your kids don't over-schedule and establish the right priorities.

Despite research showing that parents intuitively know how to balance their child's development, more and more mothers seem to be ignoring their own intuition, over scheduling, over-stressing their child in ways that are actually harmful to healthy growth.

Do you think life is too hectic, too "crazy"? Don't just shrug your shoulders and chalk it up to life in the new millennium. Being competitive shouldn't be what being a mother is about; moms need to avoid getting sucked into unhealthy peer pressure with other moms to push their kids into more and more activities.

Parents are under increasing pressure these days to help their kids succeed and to keep up with other parents (It is ironic that parents worry about the effect of peer pressure on their kids but fail to appreciate the effect peer pressure is having on them). We have become a nation of "helicopter" parents, hovering over our kids, trying to "enrich" every second of their lives with activities and feeling guilty if we don't. But finding a balance between sports and family life is vitally important.

There are lots of positives to youth sports. Participation in organized sports can provide healthy, non-violent competition, regular exercise, and ready-made social life. Ballparks and gyms can offer wholesome gathering places for parents and for children - somewhere to relax, to have fun. Sometimes, it's easier to go along with the sports scene than to develop a family's more varied activities and interests. But iff you sense that your children's participation in sports is overwhelming your family life, it may be time to make some tough decisions.