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Profantity by Coaches

Submitted by vacation1 on Wed, 10/15/2008 - 06:43.

At what point does a parent step in and say, "enough is enough." I have a highschool football player, who is one of, if not the best player on his Varsity team. In films the other day, the coach broke down each play and critized him for everything that went wrong on the offensive side of the ball. He was call a "pussy" and not sure what else, but know it was bad. I even got an e-mail from one of the players mom's asking me if my son was ok. Another parent also told me that her when her son came home, he told her the same thing about the coach. It's pretty sad that it has to be this way in sports. My son has a chance at a Division 1 scholorship, so I am afraid to address this situation with the school, but know this conduct can't be allowed to happen or continue.
Any suggestions?

0

here, check out this forum

Submitted by Taylor de Lench on Wed, 10/15/2008 - 18:18.

here, check out this forum on this topic for some more info and ideas-

http://www.momsteam.com/node/1097

If you're son is aspiring to

Submitted by Common Sense on Thu, 10/16/2008 - 18:12.

If you're son is aspiring to play D-1 football, how do you think those coaches behave?

The worst thing you could do

Submitted by Debbie Lantz on Thu, 10/16/2008 - 20:34.

The worst thing you could do is try to fix this for your son. My 16 year old hears that locker room stuff all the time and he has learned not to let it affect him. If your son has a strong self esteem, which he is going to need if he plays at a higher level, he can take care of it himself and learn how to filter the feedback he needs. I bet you there are at least two or three assistant coaches that are coming along side your son to undo any damage this coach may have done. Have faith in the foundation you have laid as parent and know he can take care of himself. Just be there to listen and offer solutions if he wants them.

Debbie Lantz
Author-"I Just Want To Play"

www.HigherRoadLeaders.com
debbie@HigherRoadLeaders.com

Lightning Rods

Submitted by Brooke de Lench on Sun, 10/19/2008 - 22:54.

Susan,

The coach is totally out of bounds and your son may want to ask him to be more respectful of him and the entire team including any adults who are involved. If he does this in front of the coach (with the support of the other boys) coach may stop to think about what he is modeling for the team. Does he want his team to be respectful or to intimidate and bully each-other?

This is a question that I often hear and I also have learned to understand that when the young men (or women) on the firing end of a weak coach speak up and request that the name calling be swapped for productive language many times the coach gains great respect for that player.

Another idea comes to mind from my own field hockey days years ago. Coach used some of us as the lightning rods because she knew we were well liked by the team. It took me forever to understand this but many years after I graduated an old team mate, Hillary, bumped into me and we talked at length about how the coach was always screaming at and berating  me. Hillary, now a well respected MD told me that coach yelled at the one person on the team whom she knew the team would rally around. I was the captain and every-time coach yelled at me I felt my team getting stronger as if to prove that we were all winners. Looking back I think Hillary may be correct- better to target one well respected player than the entire team? Who knows maybe coach knew I could take it and turn it into a positive.

And, to this day I marvel over my teammates and that magical season years ago when we did not lose one game and ended up winning the Massachusetts state championship.

hmmm,,,Maybe it is time for me to talk to my old coach and see if there was a rhyme and a reason to the berating.

Brooke de Lench

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