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encouraging a child to play a sport in which he is burned out

Submitted by sblanton on Thu, 08/21/2008 - 15:13.

My 12 year old son has played both baseball and basketball since he was very young. He is naturally athletic, and has always excelled in both sports. In the last 2 years or so, however, even though he is one of the best players on the baseball team, he seems to be losing interest in the game. His being such a good athlete causes all of the coaches to pursue him for all of the extra leagues possible, little league, all star team, fall league, etc. He tends to enjoy the first of the season, but then he gets tired of it. He has the possibility of playing for his high school JV team--even though he is just in 7th grade, but he doesn't think he really wants to. Should I encourage him to try out? Or, would it be best to let him sit this one out? I wouldn't force him to play--but I'm wondering if I should encourage him to take this opportunity? It seems like such a waste of talent, but I don't want him to quit altogether.

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Quite a dilema. I think you

Submitted by JDee on Thu, 08/21/2008 - 20:35.

Quite a dilema. I think you should have him go to a couple of practices, and then see what he thinks. He may be getting burned out because he's not pushed enough by the competition. If he's playing against kids 3-4 years older, the desire may be rekindled. I certainly wouldn't force him to play, he may end up hating it and not wanting to ever play again.
I think the other thing you'll notice is that his peers will begin to catch up over the next few years. There's a big gap in the talent level of the little league player, and that gap begins to shrink as they move into high school.

Boundaries Are Important

Submitted by Debbie Lantz on Sun, 08/24/2008 - 20:42.

I can appreciate your desire to want you son to take advantage of this great opportunity but evidently he doesn't see it as an opportunity. Allowing your son to make a decision like this shows you respect his boundaries which is a better lesson than anything he can learn by playing on the JV team at this stage in his life.

I feel this is a social pressure more than an athletic one. What does a 7th grader have in common with 9th and 10th graders? Freshman and Sophmores guys can be intimidating to a middle schooler. My son is a Sophmore in High School so I know how they think! Your son is not in their league socially or emotionally and it could cause more harm that good forcing him to mix with older high schoolers. Not to mention the pressure and teasing he would get from his same age team mates. Kids at his age don't want to be different. If you want him to continue to progress athletically, I recommend putting him in a higher ability level league at his own age. JV will come soon enough. Let him know it is okay to be a 7th grader and that he isn't wasting an opportunity. That opportunity will come again when he is ready.

Debbie Lantz
Author-"I Just Want To Play"

www.HigherRoadLeaders.com
debbie@HigherRoadLeaders.com

making a choice

Submitted by tiberiu on Wed, 04/01/2009 - 09:58.

As you said yourself: he must make a choice, but the one thing that he really needs from you is to support what ever decision he makes. So my advice is simple: let him make up his mind and after he does that, help him in what ever he desires to do next: he may want the moon in which case you will help him get the moon.
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let him quit

Submitted by Coach Tony on Thu, 02/04/2010 - 21:22.

This is a late response but it's a no-brainer.  Let the kid quit.  If he doesn't return, it's because he no longer enojoys the sport.  however, and more likely, taking a season off, especially at such a young age, can re-invigorate a kid and give them a newfound passion for the sport.

 

we as parents are always afraid of what will happen if they take a year off.  If he's a good athlete, he'll be just fine and it might be just what he needs.