1 | 2 | 3

Phase One (Exploration)
Phase Two (Commitment)
Phase Three (Proficiency)
Common Principles

Guidelines For Parents

• Introduce your child to a variety of sports: There are many sport and physical activities beyond traditional sports. Consider a variety of choices for children A diversity of sports experiences paves the way for young people to find activities they will enjoy throughout life.





• Emphasize fun and skill development: it keeps children involved and active. Encourage intrinsic motivation at an early age. Will your child continue to be fit and active as an adult? Bad experiences with sports at an early age can turn a child away from sports involvement forever.





• Nourish the dreams of the child, not your own; to do that, you need to communicate with your child.








IMPORTANT MESSAGE You are on the Old MomsTeam.com website. This article has been updated and moved to the new website. Click here to be redirected to the new site or copy and paste into your browser: http://www.momsteam.com






• Minimize competition. Children are not emotionally and cognitively ready to compete at this age. Work on building skill development; look for programs that support this philosophy.





• Ensure good coaching for continued participation and skill development. Be proactive in finding good coaches who share your values.

Overview

• Increasing commitment of young athlete to her chosen sport.





• Extent of commitment is major issue faced by family, especially for the talented athlete.

Problem Areas

• Excessive conflict
  
  

  • Parents, and sometimes coaches, may have a different set of expectations or goals than the athlete, which often leads to conflict.

  
  
  

  • The athlete has to have, or rediscover, his own personal reasons for playing sports. In other words, she needs to see that participation has intrinsic, personal value.

  
  
  

  • Only the strongest and most confident children have the skills to resist expectations of their parents and to fight for their own dreams.

  
  
  

• Burnout
  
  

  • Where the child gives up on her own dreams and adopts the goals of her parents or coach, she is doomed to failure and burnout often results.

  
  
  

  • When the external reasons for playing (to get a scholarship, to win a game, to impress a scout, to please a father) predominate over the intrinsic reasons (what I call the externalization of sports) burnout becomes likely.

  
  
  

  • If athlete feels in control so that he views participation as part of his self-development, then sports can be a healthy part of growing up. If the athlete feels controlled, and feels that he is not making the decisions or developing as an individual, burnout is more likely. A study of fifteen adolescent athletes, who had been age-group champions in their sport but had then quit, found that the way high-level sports were organized contributed to the their decision to quit: they felt little control over their own lives, and felt that they had little identity outside of being an athlete. This lack of control and restricted identity cause a great deal of stress, and the sport ceased to be fun.




• Under-Involved Parents
  
  

  • When parents display no interest whatsoever in the sporting activities of their children, it is very difficult for the young athlete to become committed to a sport. This can place a great burden on the coach, who often feels for the athlete and tries to make up for the parents’ lack of support.

  
  
  

  • When parents are not involved in their child’s activities, the few coaches who are likely to abuse a young athlete have an increased opportunity to engage in such abuse. This is why I encourage parents to form a good relationship with their child’s coaches, and why I encourage coaches to be open to parents who want to know what goes on at practices and on trips to tournaments.

1 | 2 | 3

Reprint Policy

Article Updated: August 22, 2007

When Is Your Child Old Enough for You to Get Involved in Youth Sports?
Five Ways For Sport Parents To Set A Good Example
The Dark Side Of Youth Sports
Escaping The Parent Trap
Youth Sports Motivation Questionnaire (Parents Version)
Youth Sports Motivation Questionnaire (Youth Athlete Version)

8 Tips for a Successful Youth Sports Preseason Meeting
Keeping Her Children Grounded Despite Their Athletic Success
Youth Sports: Taking A Toll On Family Life

Printer-friendly Version

Send MomsTeam Feedback