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Rose Colored Glasses
The Problem Areas
    Out Of Control Parents
    Child Exploitation
    Youth Sports Dropouts
    Endangering Young Athletes’ Health
    Sexual Abuse Of Young Athletes
    Youth Sports Violence
Meeting The Needs Of Kids And Adults

In my view, it is because, for parents, the youth sports experience:

• Is seductive: It isn't that bad parents make the youth sports experience a bad one. It is that the strong emotions aroused by seeing your own child, your own flesh and blood, locked in a competitive struggle with others lures parents into acting in ways that end up hurting their children, or their relationship with their children. The seductiveness of the youth sports experience draws those involved into a tangle of emotions.





• Provides an ego trip: There is a great deal of narcissistic appeal in sports competition. Parents who fall into this trap begin to act impulsively, letting their emotions get the better of them, and are often viewed by others as acting like children rather than adults.





• Exceeds some parents' ability to cope. Parents who lack the skills to cope with the powerful emotions of ego gratification triggered in them by watching their child compete are those most strongly affected by participation in youth sports programs. These are the individuals who come to be viewed by others as out of control but who believe that they are doing what is best for their child.

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The question is often asked, is competition bad for children? We should also ask, is being a parent of a competitive youth sports participant bad for parents? Sometimes, a child isn't old enough for a parent to handle the stress of competition

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Child Exploitation

The evolving trend toward children being younger and younger when they begin to specialize in a particular sport makes me uneasy. In her book Little Girls In Pretty Boxes, author Joan Ryan concluded that our insatiable national appetite for new stars has resulted in "consumption and disposal of these young athletes" that is "tantamount to child exploitation and, in too many cases, child abuse."

Child exploitation in youth sports is not limited to such high-profile sports as figure skating and gymnastics. The potential is present whenever a family faces decisions on how to help a talented child progress to the next level. The potential for exploitation is high whenever youngsters become involved in high-intensity training programs. It is difficult for many thirteen-year-olds to remain committed to such a program, whether the sport is gymnastics, football, swimming, or wrestling, but it is more likely when a determined parent insists that the child continue or risk being labeled a "quitter."

Here are some questions to ponder:

• Should parents decide? A seven year old, even one ten years old, is too young to decide to begin intense training. Parents say they are "doing it for my child," but is it really possible for parents to make such decisions, or is part of the decision based on their own desires and on their own competitive drive? Are decisions about the child being made for their own good, or can financial incentives cloud the judgment of the adults involved?





• Do young athletes need to be protected against exploitation and abuse? In 1993, sociologist Peter Donnelly called for the enactment of some form of child-labor law to protect the welfare of elite young athletes. He argues that when parents, agents, and administrators stand to make a large profit from the performance of a child athlete, the young athlete deserves some protection.





• Is having athletic talent a curse rather than a blessing? So much is expected of so-called talented athletes, and often, at the end of the road, after all the struggles, they receive so little for their efforts. Is it worth it?

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Article Updated: August 25, 2007

When Is Your Child Old Enough for You to Get Involved in Youth Sports?
Five Ways For Sport Parents To Set A Good Example
Escaping The Parent Trap
Successful Development Of the Young Athlete: Guidelines For Parents
Youth Sports Motivation Questionnaire (Parents Version)
Youth Sports Motivation Questionnaire (Youth Athlete Version)

Rethinking Youth Sports: The MomsTeam Approach
Pulling A Child Off A Sports Team For Poor Grades Sends The Wrong Message
Abuse, Harassment, And Neglect: The Pain Of Emotional Injuries
Does Your Child's Program Use The "Games Based Approach" To Teaching Sports?
Equal Playing Time: Should It Be The Rule, Not The Exception?

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